It's 5:00 p.m. and I've just walked in the door. I'm tired, the
living room's a mess, and the kitchen sink is full of last night's
dinner dishes. So whose turn is it to do the dishes anyway? My
husband did them last...his tolerance for dirty dishes is much lower
than mine when we end up in a standoff to see who can stand the dirty
dishes the longest. I always win.
I don't really mind doing the dishes, but I do take exception to
doing the dishes, cooking dinner, cleaning up the living room, and
making sure the laundry's started. Especially after a 9-hour day at
work. So what's the answer? Blackmail, bribery, intimidation? Why not
work out a solution that benefits the whole family and encourages
everyone to work together?
If your children receive an weekly allowance, you should make them
work for it, and from a very young age. I started giving my daughter
an allowance before she was told she had to participate in the
household chores (besides cleaning her room), and you can only
imagine her reaction when all the sudden she had to work for it.
How you determine the division of labor in your home depends on how
many children you have, and how much work you want them to actually
do. We only have once child, so I didn't figure it was fair to make
her do the majority of the household chores. If we had more children
who were old enough to help out around the house, they would
definitely have a larger share of the workload. So in our case we
chose a fairly equitable distribution: one person does the dishes and
mops the kitchen floor, one person picks up the living room, dusts,
and vacuums, and one person does the laundry. Our schedules rotate on
a weekly basis. That way everyone has to do each job, but only every
3 weeks. You wouldn't believe how much it improves your attitude
knowing you don't have to do the dishes for 2 weeks.
It's suddenly no big deal! This arrangement has worked very well for
us. My husband and I just wanted the house picked up but don't want
to feel like one of us is doing all of the work, and our daughter
doesn't want to lose her allowance. Everyone's happy. There are a lot
of other household chores not covered in our agreement, but we chose
to tackle the big, everyday, most overwhelming chores that no one
ever wanted to take responsibility for. I usually end up cleaning the
bathrooms, cleaning out the litterbox, etc., but it doesn't really
bother me. My husband definitely does his share. He insists on
vacuuming under the chairs and couches, and that's fine with me. I'll
let him if it makes him happy.
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